Are You FREAKING kidding me? EWWW!!!

Are you freaking kidding me??? THIS is what my stomach looks like right now! AND my legs, AND my arms, AND AND AND!!! (I of course would have spared you the icky picture, but I've been in trouble in past for blogging about what things look like and not posting pic! AND, if you are my friend, this will get more sympathy ratings, and if you are NOT my friend and it grosses you out...GOOD!)

OK, let's go. SICK! So, I thought that I was having some dreaded allergic reaction to "last years" sunscreen that I decided to use. The other possibility was that it was some sorta dreaded reaction to Bath & Body Works (new flavor) lotion that I used the night before it erupted! OH, but no. Because that would mean that I could get an allergy pill or something and clear it up. NOOOO, instead...it's a delayed reaction to the Strep Throat I had a few weeks ago. (That in itself is blog worthy...I mean, am I six years old? Did I lick the handle on the grocery cart and forget that? My KIDS did not get Strep Throat. Why me? WHYYYYYYYYY????? *extra whining tone inserted*)

Guttate Psoriasis.
http://www.webmd.com/skin-problems-and-treatments/psoriasis/guttate-psoriasis

ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING ME??? SO, here's the deal. I happen to have psoriasis. I happen to be extremely familiar with this crap disease. I also happen to have a form of arthritis that resembles rhumetoid that is called Psoriatic Arthritis. I inject Enbrel once a week and have become "a new woman" and a walking commercial. (To the tune of $1400/month without insurance; thank GOD I only pay $100). SO, I am extremely familiar with the PROGNOSIS of this crap! It basically has to "run it's course". Did I say "ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?"

My high school reunion is in 2 weeks. Someone asked me "Well, what are you gonna do, strip at your reunion?" NO smarta@#$...but what about the hot dress I wanted to wear, never mind the pool day on Saturday!?! Never mind the fact that even if I didn't have a reunion coming up (and haven't dieted, so this is just an extra dose of ickiness) it's FLIPPIN SUMMERTIME!!!

GEEZ! Are you KIDDING ME??? SO, yes, it seems as though I am doomed to sport the lovely RAISED red rash for up to a month? Maybe longer???

UM, ARE YOU FREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAKKKKKKINNNNNGGGGGGGGG KIDDING ME???

ARRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!

I'm none too pleased.

Calling all Dog Whisperer's

Calling all Dog Whisperer’s


HELP! OK, here's the scoop. I have a Harley. He's my dog, not a hog. I adopted him 2 1/2 years ago from the pound after getting rid of a Jack Russell Terror. I LOVE this mutt! But I need major help right now, as the advice I've been hearing is to let him go.

FULL STORY: Harley pees in the house. He always has if I'm honest. I could sit here and justify him, which is what I've done for the past 2 1/2 years. 1) I am not good at ALWAYS putting him in his crate if I run somewhere. 2) I leave him out at night sometimes (to protect me)...and to keep from getting up when he barks for me in the middle of the night (honesty again). 3) He was a stray and a year old when I got him, so he had bad habits in place already.

Harley rules the roost. He goes in and out all day (which, when I start working, isn't gonna be happening). We always have to go open the door for him and have no idea if he's peeing or not as he just likes to play outside. He DOES NOT however want to be an outdoor dog at all and would drive my neighbors crazy sitting at the backdoor barking to come in. (He's NOT a barker, just when he wants in. Barks once. Then again. Then again. You get it.) SO, we have no idea what kinda potty schedule he really runs. All I know is, he has AMPLE time to be doing his deed OUTSIDE!

More of the scoop. I'm recently divorced (no, he's not traumatized, he peed at the last house too) and we've moved into new house. Well, he is quickly making my living room floor a pee stained mess!!! Once or twice ok! Not kidding, he did it THREE TIMES yesterday! WTF!!!! And I used to think I could only scold him if I caught him in the act. Well, nooooo, this dog knows exactly what he's done! If I call him nicely and he comes and sees me standing near it...he will stop mid tracks like "oh crap!"

Now for the good of Harley. He's a very sweet dog. He does let me know when there's strangers around :) He does give me a sense of security. He loves us unconditionally. My kids would be devastated to get rid of him (and that's something I would have a very difficult time with considering the rest of the transition I'm putting them through). He's way funny. He's fun to play with. He's part of our family dang-it! My little Harley-pants.

I've already considered how hard it will be having a dog when I go back to work. Who will let him out? How long can he stay in his crate all day...and then night too? What kinda life is that? But thinking about letting my Harley go is really really saddening me. HELP! Is there a magic pee pill???

Sorry to blog all over you.....

Things my kids say...Part 2...yep, there was a Part 1 sometime back.

Toes
While cutting my sons grossy gross dirty toenails tonight I was informed that "Albert Pujols toes are just like this." "REALLY, how do you know?" "I read it in a magazine." Really, like Celebrity Toes InDepth? What magazine was that?

Softball
This evening my daughter swung a little too hard? She informed me that she "cracked her butt". Um...I informed her she came that way like the rest of us???

Underwear
My 7 yr old son came stomping out of his room with his cutey little man gray briefs flailing around in the air (because no longer will we ever wear undies with cartoons on them and after seeing the little boy on the opposing baseball team the other night with NEMO flashing through his white b-ball pants...I'm a no-cartoon supporter) throwing a fit that "I ONLY HAVE ONE PAIR OF UNDERWEAR IN MY DRAWER!" After asking him sarcastically if he needed one for each cheek I sent him to bed and threatened him with laundry duty! Cheeeeky indeed!

Peek-sures
After seeing the recent pics I took and posted on Myspace my son informed me I looked OLD! He was specifically talking about one black and white photo so I replied "You mean like an old-time photograph?" To which he replied, "No, like you're FIFTY!" I sent him to bed that night as well.

Birds and Bees
My 10 3/4 year old daughter has no interest in learning too much about the birds and the bees. OK, fine with me. Although lately it seems that the topic comes up way too many times (innocently enough) with her 7 yr old brother in ear distance, or when we're like 2 minutes from arriving at next activity and "it's a longer conversation than this". The other day (with 2 minutes to arrival)she proceeded to tell me that she heard that Jamie Lynn Spears was having a baby (we're a little behind on "news"). Many times I've shared with my kids not to believe everything they read, that a lot of it is made up and to always seek truth. Well, she informed me that it wasn't true (and defended this to all of her friends) because she wasn't married! I told her that she WAS pregnant and that started it. "How?" "What exactly do you mean her and her boyfriend got together?" (Really? Exactly? Like right now 2 minutes out to arrival? Because I took you on an entire girls TRIP to try to get you to talk and you put your hand in my face saying TMI!) Luckily she's slept since then and discovered her butt is cracked...so we've not had THE conversation. Yay me for another couple of days probably.

Oh geesh...there's SO many more things that have had me half laughing at them lately. But I'm forgetting in my OLD AGE and can't think right now. So, I'll post a Part 3 later I guess.

BILLS

OK...so "I'm a big girl now...". I no longer receive fun mail order catalogs and invites to every subdivision affair. I don't open my mailbox to birthday party invites for the kids' friends (because they don't know our address yet...we just got home from a party via email invite). I haven't received a letter from a long lost friend or even a handful of sweepstakes entries (do they send those anymore or were they out-lawed?). I now receive BILLS, BILLS, BILLS. And guess what...they gotta be paid. HAHA

Today was bill writing day for me and I haven't written a bill payment in, hmm, like 15 years. SO, that was fun. Don't forget to write your account number on the memo portion. Make sure the address shows through the window. Place stamp in box. (Note to self...buy business envelopes because Ameren UE is too cheap to send return envelopes with their bill and I had to send it in a pink hallmark card envelope.)

Um, it is feasible to consider a job now. And "support" checks would be nice. EEKS, is my mortgage payment really THAT MUCH? Time to re-finance already!!! It is finished. They're all signed, licked and headed to the box. Yay me. (Hey, the Cosmo subscription was less than $20. What?)

Backtracking on house

SOOOO, I haven't taken any "after" shots of the house yet. But I will! Here's some lovely pics of the before action. We moved in with the help of many fabulous friends that I am forever grateful to on Memorial Day weekend. My kiddos were out of town and when they got HOME Monday, their rooms were put together and the house looked and felt like home. SOOOO many stories on the progress and happenings around this place. I may venture back and blog about some of them...or I may just stay on forward motion. THANK YOU MY FRIENDS FOR ALL OF THE SUPPORT, HELP, ENCOURAGEMENT, ETC ETC! Gonna find out what I'm made of now. Oh, I got mail too! Um, a mortgage bill and an electric bill. Yay me....